Unfettered Blather

I noticed the advertisements on G4 for a new game show called “Hurl”. Contestants go through an eating contest and then have to do a bunch of exercises like zero-g machines and other naseua inducing activities. The last person to not vomit wins. They are graphically showing people throwing up.

I have a pretty high bodily fluid tolerance, but the last thing I want to see is people repeatedly throwing up. Technicolor yawns are just not something I want to see. Is there really an audience out there that wants to see people losing their lunch? The part that concerns me is that they would only make this show if they thought there was an audience for is.

A common criticism of entertainment pundits or critics is over “brainless” entertainment. This could be anything, books, movies, television, or video games. There is a constant stream of derision spewed at anything they don’t see as intellectually stimulating. They turn there noses up at such offerings and then question the intelligence of people who partake in these pedestrian attempts at entertainment.

Let me respond to this criticism. Up yours!

I’m not too concerned about how intelligent I appear to others, I feel pretty secure in my intelligence. I could offer a list of qualifications to “prove” to you how intelligent I am, but really that’s pointless and doesn’t display that I actually have confidence in my intellectual abilities. However, in defense of “mindless entertainment” let me offer the following. By day I develop or design software. When I’m not doing that I am working with less experience developers helping them find solutions. When I’m not doing that I am analyzing or chasing down requirements. When I’m not doing that I am analyzing programming errors and devising solutions. Essentially, I think all day long. I think for a living. This is not simple stuff like 2+2=x. This is complex logic that requires I follow certain standards, maintain functionality, and protect the business of the company I work for and the customers that rely on our products. I think, I think, and then I think some more.

So when I am not at work, where I get paid to think I want a little downtime, a chance to maybe put the old grey matter into neutral for awhile and just coast. If I want entertainment then I want to be entertained. I don’t necessarily want to be “challenged” or what is more likely is to be preached to about how I am not socially conscious enough, not environmentally conscious enough, not intellectually conscious enough, and so on and so forth. I do not like pretentiuous gasbags who have never met me and know nothing about me demanding I spend my off hours doing the same thing I do all day. Which isn’t to say I eschew anything that makes me think, but I also feel I don’t have to always be engaged in some fashion.

Let’s also not forget that most people who produce entertainment media are really no more intelligent than I am, or more intelligent than the people they routinely produce entertainment for. So when some entertainer, producer, writer, developer, or whatever decides they want to “challenge” their audience it’s not unlike having a kindergartner telling their classmates why they’re such a better kindergartner than everyone else. It’s kind of cute and you want to pat them on their head for this misguided conceit, but they really don’t have much of a case to make. Even if you have someone intelligent producing entertainment, they often then miss the idea that it should be entertaining. Thus, what you are asking me to do is to not enjoy myself in non-work hours and continue to do something I already do all day.

I don’t just think at work, I think all the time. I can’t shut off my brain. When I’m not at work I think about politics, I think about family, I think about religion, I think about how I am raising children, I think about our education system, I think about the state of the world, and so on and so forth. Good Lord people, let me just be entertained! Let me be able to get away from all this nonsense, let me get away from thinking about things I have no control over. Let me escape from my worries and from the problems of the world for just a little while. Quit trying to force your issues upon me!

Let me escape and I promise to not just do that. I promise not to jump from one escapist fantasy to the other. I promise to remain rooted in the real world, but let problems be problems and let entertainment be entertainment.

Typically I don’t do commentary on celebrity screw-ups unless it’s something that’s just too interesting or irritating to pass up. As a result, I have not said much about the whole Jamie-Lynn Spears preganacy scuffle because I honestly think it’s not a big deal in the way people are making a big deal out of it. The whole “role model” thing and “impact of a young star getting pregnant” seems pretty trivial compared to the jeopardy she is placing her own career not to mention all of the people who are employed as a result of Zoey 101. When someone like Ms. Spears gets pregnant and puts her career at risk, she is also risking the jobs of others.

Ok, spiel over, what I really find interesting was the prediction that the 4th season of her show would not air. Now, granted, I’m betting pretty heavily against a 5th season under the circumstances. Not just because she’s pregnant but 5 seasons for that kind of show is probably some kind of special accomplishment anyway. The point is, the 4th season had been completed before her pregnancy announcement. You don’t just throw away an entire season of a show you have already shot, that’s a huge wasted investment and anyone who thought it wouldn’t air obviously has no grasp of what it costs to produce even a relatively low budget show like Zoey 101. Even if advertisers want lower rates and ratings drop, they at least have a shot at recouping some of their costs. Money made by not airing? I’m gonna guess it’s somewhere at ZERO.

While there may be some moral outrage over airing a series where the teenage star is pregnant, I think the powers that be understand it will blow over and will be less financially harmful than pissing off their advertisers. I have to be honest here, even as a fundamentalist Christian, if I were in charge I would probably have continued to air the 4th season as well because there is way too much riding on it. While I think what Ms. Spears did was a stupid career move and incredibly selfish, I think the moral outrage is displaced. I certainly don’t expect moral outrage to lead to a stupid business decision. Having sex and getting pregnant was a stupid move, but having Nickolodeon cancel an entire season of a show would just be another stupid move. I’m not sure how that evens out.

Just to jump on the bandwagon, here are my bold predictions for 2008.

GAMING -
Microsoft will continue to release special editions of the X-Box 360 that will cost more than a regular edition but not come with anything worth the extra $50. Gamers will buy them in droves.

The X-Box 360 Arcade will be discontinued. The price of the 360 and 360 Elite will drop by $50. The PS3 will not drop due to Sony’s reluctance to lose anymore money on the console. The Wii will probably not drop in price since it will still be cheaper than any of its competitors.

Wii total sales will surpass the X-Box 360 in America. Not much of a prediction since it already leads in Worldwide sales.

In 2008, Sony will finally hit a higher per month sales average of PS3’s than the 360. It will not be enough to get them second place though.

Christmas 2008 will be Sony’s year, as people who held off to get a 360 and a Wii should have them. Also, as Blu-Ray continues to win studios consumers will finally begin to pick sides, making the PS3 attractive at last. Blu-Ray will end up selling more PS3’s than the PS3 will sell Blu-Ray.

Wii shortages will continue for the first quarter of the year, with demand and supply finally levelling off around or after March. Sales will continue to go strong even as demand decreases and supply increases. The Wii will outsell every other console January through October. The holiday season is the only time it will be vulnerable.

Sony will regret sacrificing the gaming market to push Blu-Ray, especially as they find out that victory will be through the studios and not through hardware sales or consumers. Expect more shake-ups at Sony this year.

PC gaming will take a major hit as current generation consoles enter more homes. Companies will finally figure out that very few MMORPG’s are successful and so one of the last bastions of PC gaming will slowly subside until only a few established brands remain. Expect PC games to get even less respect from retailers than ever before.

TECHNOLOGY -
High Definition will continue to be pushed, but will still not see mass market acceptance. The format war between HD-DVD and Blu-Ray will add to this problem. HD TV’s will continue to drop in price and pave the way for widespread acceptance in 2009. Thank an early adopter, you’ll owe them big time.

Blu-Ray will win the format war. Toshiba will not rise to Sony’s challenge and the widespread studio exclusive acceptance of Blu-Ray will be the death knell of HD-DVD. The format war will not be decided by consumers who will be more than happy to watch movies on DVD’s until the format war is resolved. Instead, Sony will use its considerable muscle and resources to strike deals until HD-DVD is simply pushed out of the market.

Microsoft will have to make some major changes to Vista, and consumer acceptance will be lower than any other OS they’ve ever released. Even non-tech savvy consumers will balk at the system resources Vista demands. Despite all these problems, Apple will still be largely ignored by most PC users.

Netflix will be bought by Blockbuster. Blockbuster may also make a move to buy Hollywood Video again. Regardless of what happens, the video rental market will continue to decline as more cable services offer movies on demand at low cost and at the same time DVD’s are released. What few advantages Blockbuster has left will finally be stripped away as more people adopt DVR technology and cable services strike more advantageous deals with movie studios. Blockbuster will post a big loss.

ENTERTAINMENT -
The Writer’s Strike will be resolved in the first three months of 2008, but no one will be happy with the deal. Despite being the least culpable, writers will be villified while the celebrities who make the real money will come off smelling like roses and the Writer’s Guild, which is more of a culprit than the actual writers, will be mostly overlooked. The WGA and the media will attempt to make studio bosses into the bad guys, but people will continue not to care.

The Writer’s Strike will have a drastic impact on how we watch TV. Many viewers will find alternatives to watching regular TV shows and simply not come back. Ratings will not recover and the industry may finally look to changing the outdated model of “seasons” as a way of producing TV shows.

2008 will have a glut of reality TV even after the strike is over. This will be the worst year ever for reality TV.

Studios will get tired of celebrities in crisis and careers will be ruined much faster than ever before as everyone finally gets tired of people who make too much money being willing to throw it away for stupid reasons.

Studios will continue to lament how movies don’t make any money while the stars will continue to demand greater residuals and cuts of the profits in addition to their regular salaries. Despite this obvious problem, writers will get most of the blame this year as a result of the strike and nothing substantial will be accomplished.

Movie theaters will see a big decline in attendance this year as more homes get High Definition sets and people can actually get a better experience at home than most theaters can ever hope to provide. Look for a big push for new technology to give theaters a better picture and more studio seating, but consumers won’t care.

POLITICS -
The media will finally have to admit the surge is working and things are looking better in Iraq. George W. Bush will still get credit for none of it though and conservative pundits will froth at the mouth over it. Unfortunately, Afghanistan will continue to decline, partly due to the media focus on trying to make Iraq look like a failure.

Michael Yon will get snubbed for a Pulitzer despite giving the best war coverage of any correspondent in the last 30 years.

Congress will get another major shake-up as voters decide they’ve finally had enough. Some major incumbents will finally lose office. Neither party will have significant sway after the 2008 elections as voters finally get fed up with partisan bickering. Ironically, the end result with a closer margin in congress will mean more partisan bickering and they’ll repeat all of the same mistakes of the current and previous Congress.

Despite being everything conservatives have asked for, Fred Thompson will not get the nomination for President. He will be considered and may even get the VP slot for whoever ultimately wins.

Voters will say “Enough!” to divisive candidates and Clinton and Huckabee will be jettisoned midway through the primaries. Clinton supporters will throw a massive hissy fit.

Obama will win the Democratic nomination and prove to be much more popular with swing voters than conservatives will admit. Even if Obama is defeated this year, he will become a formidable opponent in the 2016 race, with this election cycle providing him much of the experience to become a political juggernaut in coming years. Unlike John Kerry, Obama will not fade into the woodwork if he is defeated.

I never could get into Ally McBeal and this latest show Brothers & Sisters, that my wife has been watching, isn’t really grabbing me either.

I simply do not get Ms. Flockhart as an object of desire. I have no problem with skinny women, but she is just too skinny. She has the body of a ten year old girl. I don’t find her attractive, I want to buy her a sandwhich, perhaps get her a blanket, and give her directions to some people that can help. She’s cute in her own way, I’m not making any insinuations about anorexia or the usual snide contemptuous comments, I just don’t buy her as someone that men would fall at her feet for.

This is something that seems pretty common in a lot of Hollywood entertainment, where you have a primary female protagonist surrounded by more attractive, more interesting, and/or more intelligent women than her. Yet somehow they want me to believe that this less engaging woman is somehow more highly sought after. My suspension of disbelief just won’t stretch that far.

Some might say “Hey, it’s not all about looks”. I’d agree if Ms. Flockhart played characters that didn’t drive me over the edge in frustration. Ally McBeal was an exercise in recovery from self-inflicted wounds. I never understood the appeal of a show about a woman who continually makes bad choices and then acts as if life is so unfair. Maybe it’s something a lot of people could identify with? Now she is playing the part of what Hollywood sees as a typical Republican pundit. Droll, boring, and hypocritical. Ok, she’s nailing the part, but the character is not interesting at all.

Perhaps it’s just a clever campaign by Hollywood to show us that there are better women in the real world around us all the time. Naw. They’d never be that clever.