Without too much effort, this site easily draws 200 unique visitors a day, which is enough to get the occassional comment and rare real discussion going. I seem to bring in an inordinate amount of spammers as well. A lot of bloggers scratch their heads over how to increase traffic, but it’s really not that hard, it is a lot of work. To me, an audience was important because this was a place to interact, sometimes be told outright that I’m wrong. I was sanguine with differing opinions. I’m willing to have my mind changed. However, getting that audience and maintaining it? I just can’t do it right now. Without that interaction, this place is just a digital soapbox for me, and I lack the sense of self importance to post routine rants about how wise I am and how messed up the world is. Let me break it down like this.

Games or blogging?
If I mostly talk about gaming, what good does it do for me to blog instead of play games? I’ve been in this situation before and it led to a year long hiatus. You can’t write about what you love and not do what you love anymore. Between the longer hours at work and studying for my certification I know I’m going to be looking at a choice once more. I play games to relieve stress. I write to clear up the clutter in my brain. I have other means to accomplish both, but I’d rather spend the time playing games then writing about games. I could write here and there, but that’s only going to drive my numbers down and turn this place into yet another digital soapbox, another voice adding to the cacophony. No thanks.

I need to focus on my career.
I spent most of my time at my previous employer leading software development teams. Not as a manager per se, but usually the guy right below. I loved this role and it helped me decide how I wanted to proceed. I knew I would end up in management some day, but I got there about five years earlier than planned. Now that I’m here and the economy sucks eggs, I really have no choice but to plow forward. I need to focus on getting my Project Management Professional certification and maybe after that I might try to learn more about .NET so I can share more common ground with the team I lead.

People are more important.
While I want to focus on my career and enjoy my hobby, the other distraction is my team. I made a commitment when I became the manager of this team that I would set and example, be honest about ways I could improve myself, and look for ways to grow them in their jobs and careers. I care about these people. They are not my friends, but I don’t think of them as employees. They are my teammates, the people who I rely on everyday. I owe them my best. Focusing on blog articles, formulating ideas, trying to schedule with Buddy, these are all activities that take my focus away from people who rely on me to lead them and stand up for them. We had a layoff this month and I take it personally that some members of my team lost their jobs. Did I really do my job to the best of my ability? Was there anything I could do to make our business better? I don’t know that there was anything I could have done to prevent what happened, but I do know that I have an obligation to make sure my team is always doing there best, because their jobs depend on it.

Family is the most important
I’ve routinely put my family before blogging, this was never a choice. Certainly they are not causing me to give this up now. However, I won’t lie and say that they are not yet another reason I need to give up this site. All told, not counting domain registration costs, this website costs about $14 a month. Pocket change compared to my gaming budget. Still, with the economy being what it is, every expense we don’t need is simply a drain. I want to be out of debt this year, I don’t know if that will happen. At best we’ll be done by November, at worst we’ll be done by February. Once we’re clear, I will have an extra $800 a month to fall back on. That is a huge chunk of change to me. I need to get this financial pressure off my family. It’s not good for my wife because she stresses. I’ve been out of work before and with the recent layoffs at my company it makes her more nervous. Mentally, I need to focus some of my energies on the house in addition to my career and my team. I haven’t been writing as much because I simply lack the concentration.

All that said, I am not turning the website over to Buddy Pine. While Buddy is a good friend, his business is booming and he has about as much time as I do. We talked at length about this last week and both agreed that neither one of us can continue the site.

I’d still like to write about games, but I can’t do it as a one man show. I’d consider a writing gig on the side, guest blogger, volunteer work, whatever. I just can’t do it five times or even three times a week anymore.

I loved running this website, I loved writing, and I loved it when a real discussion cropped up. I’ll miss doing this. I won’t promise that this is my last post on the site, I’ll see if any follow-up is needed. However, if this is not the last word here, it will be even lighter than normal until May 31st finally arrives.

There have always been complaints about Microsoft Points and how Microsoft refuses to do anything in actual dollars. Part of the problem is the wonky conversion. In the United States, 400 MS Points is equal to $5 but the smallest unit you can buy is 500, which comes out to $6.25. This causes no end of complaints, especially when Wii Points are essentially 100 per $1. However, I find Microsoft Points to be entirely consistent with how Microsoft does business and especially how it treats its customers.

So how do you win this “game”?

There really are only two options.

1. Refuse to play
2. Don’t worry about it.

Any other solution causes heartache and grief over a business practice that is unlikely to change this hardware generation. The simple fact is that the way MS points work the most you’re likely to be out is a couple of cents, maybe a buck at the most. In the meantime, all the ranting, raving, and obsessing doesn’t do anything but create unnecessary stress.

I don’t worry about it because points don’t expire. If I don’t have enough I don’t worry about the fact that I will have to purchase more than I need. The unused points will just go to a future purchase. I’ve carried a balance as low as 30 points, which is essentially worthless. Those 30 points are worth less than half a dollar, though I can still use them in conjunction with a future points purchase.

At best, Microsoft may end up profitting a few cents that I’ll never spend. I’m able to afford a 360, a subscription to X-Box Live, and have enough disposable income to actually buy things off the service. I think I can afford to lose a few random cents over the next few years.

What I haven’t seen yet is the real potential of a service like OnLive, but when people talk about “A new way to play games on the PC” they’re thinking too small. If all the heavy lifting is done on a server somewhere, why would this be limited to a PC?

Let’s get a few things out of the way, I’m well aware of the technical limitations right now. At some point in the future someone is going to figure this out and make it work. Maybe it won’t be OnLive, but this is a direction the industry has been looking at for awhile. OnLive is possibly just the first to really make a go. We already have browser gaming thanks to GameTap, so the ability to deliver content through a browser is possible and happens already. What OnLive introduces is more reliance on the server side and a true thin client. Honestly, lots of non-gaming applications already do this. The question now is “when” not “if” they can get it to work.

When OnLive, or whatever, finally becomes available there is nothing that says you will actually need a PC to make it work. They might be saying it now, but all you really need is enough processor to handle the content and rendering graphics. A console with the ability to interact with OnLive could do this, a blackberry hooked up to a monitor and keyboard like I suggested in my original article could do it if it had the rendering capabilities, older PC’s in need of an upgrade suddenly become viable. The possibilities are endless.

Not only that, but it’s not really a bold and daring idea. On demand content is already becoming commonplace with movies. This fits the general public’s expectations just fine. The only thing holding all this back is that the infrastructure may just not be ready to handle this kind of service on a massive scale.

My wife commented, as she always does, that I should be in bed. Frankly, if I’m not well enough to go into the office then I feel I should at least enjoy my time knowing that work is stacking up in my absence. A few checks of my work e-mail today confirmed just that.

The other nice thing about playing videogames all day while I’m sick is that it is an affirmation that my hobby has limits. I definitely do not see myself being able to do this all the time every day. As much as I love my games, doing nothing but gets old after awhile.

Oddly, my near drowning last year was not enough of a catalyst to get me where I needed to be. I was making efforts to get in better shape but the diet and weight loss were not forming. I was making great strides on my mile time but nothing else seemed to be working. Unfortunately, without the accompanying weight loss all the running was playing merry hell on my knees. Things were not getting better. I won’t go into details but the catalyst came February of this year. I realized that I was going to need a lifestyle change in order to lose weight.

The first thing to go was the gym, believe it or not. At every gym I’ve ever been to there are only two kinds of people. Those that are in shape and doing it to maintain it or those that are not and workout to say they’re doing something. Sadly, I was in the latter group. You can go to the gym every day, work out hard for an hour, and not make any progress. The idea of exercise is good, but as a weight loss plan it is a failure.

I purchased a treadmill to do my runs at home. I love using the treadmill because it forces me to keep a pace and I don’t have to deal with uneven terrain, which is hell on my ankles and knees. Not to mention it saves me time because I can just hop on it and do my thing. Long term I might want to add some weight training, but right now I just want cardio and now I can do it at home. Also, I can’t avoid it, the damn thing sits in my house where I see it everyday. The gym is easy to blow off because it is an abstract concept so long as I’m not there.

According to my research you have to burn 3,500 calories to lose 1 pound. A good intensive hour long workout is probably going to burn 500 calories. The reality is you’ll be lucky to hit 500 especially if you’re not used to working out. You need to burn another 3,000 calories in order to lose 1 pound, so where do you make up the deficit?

The average diet assumes a consumption of 2,000 calories a day. Anything more and your body is probably storing it as fat. You work out and burn 500 calories one day and consume 2,500 calories then you broke even. No weight loss. A platter of cheese fries is 1,930 calories by itself. A chicken sandwhich from a popular franchise is roughly 400 calories. Do you see where I am going with this? 2,000 calories is actually quite a bit, but with the wrong kinds of eating habits can be easily exceeded. To lose weight you’re going to have to change how you eat. This is where my problem lies.

On an average day I will probably do 100 calories for breakfast, 500 calories for lunch, and maybe another 700 for dinner. Hmmm….that’s 1,300 calories a day. Why wasn’t I already losing weight?

The answer is simplicity itself, I hadn’t really changed anything. I was still going out to lunch on a regular basis. Let’s say twice a week. Going out is easily 1,000 to 1,500 calories each time. Pizza for dinner every Friday. Again, easily 1,000 to 1,500 depending on toppings and consumption. I would snack on candy around the office every day and sometimes would buy stuff and keep it in my desk. I would estimate an easy 500 calories a day. I was probably averaging over 2,000 calories a day but I figure I wasn’t gaining anything either because I’m burning more carrying around the extra weight. In short, 220 pounds was my equilibrium. I have been heavier, for short periods of time, due to even less activity and greater consumption.

All I did was cut out snacking and I count calories. I aim for 1,500 a day, but anything under 1,800 is probably good. I’m losing rapidly. I only work out for 30 minutes and right now I average about 250 calories a workout. The workouts are for fitness, the diet is for weight loss.

Here’s the punchline though, my eating habits are still bad. I’ve dropped over 20 pounds already, which is good. That’s the most I’ve lost in a long time. At some point I’m going to hit my goal. What then? The good news is my body is responding better to food. I get full quicker, I feel worse when I overeat. The signals my body used to send too late or not at all seem to actually happen now. Unfortunately, to get that way I practically starved myself the first two weeks of my diet. When I started eating regularly again my body just didn’t want a lot of food. However, when I hit my goal, which is 50 pounds, then I have to reach a new equilibrium so I don’t creep back up to 220 again. I plan to still be running and probably burning more calories.

I wouldn’t say I’m a model, but a hard look at my lifestyle gives me an idea of why so many Americans struggle so much with their weight. You can’t just say “Eat less and exercise” because it’s really not that simple. Yes, that’s the foundation you’ll rely on, but that is all it is. You have to accept that your everyday habits must change.

I recently picked up BAJA: Edge of Control because it looked like an interesting game. I’ve never gotten that much into rally racing games because so few have been done well. Off-road racing simulators can be a lot of fun when done right, and the differences between driving on asphalt and driving on, well, anything else, make rally racers feel like an entirely different genre where you happen to also drive vehicles with wheels very fast and try to cross a finish line first. Everything else is different.

Understanding this difference, I expect vehicles to handle differently than they might in other racers. What I do not appreciate is to suddenly find myself veering to the right for no good reason or flying sideways off the track. I mean, literally, flying. I wish I had a video but the manuever shouldn’t even be possible and I notice that none of my AI opponents seem to have a similar handicap. Then again, I also noticed that not only do I always start in last place but I’m easily three car lengths behind the rest of the pack at the starting line. Why? Is the AI so weak that I will just skunk it if I could actually get the vehicle to do what I want? I wouldn’t mind skidding out of control so much if was because I went too fast into a turn on mud or hit some ruts while going full out. It is frustrating to have slowed down to almost a stop, compensated, and still get pulled in a different direction. I feel as though the game doesn’t even care what I am trying to do.

I know it’s not a racing game, but I can’t help but compare it to Street Fighter IV. While I acknowledge that Street Fighter IV is largely successful for going back to its roots, one thing they really translated well from the old Street Fighter II are the controls. If I attempt a fireball and screw-up I always feel like it is my fault. Hard kick, flip, jump, everything happens exactly like I want and the game does it right away. If I goof up a move, and I do it often, I know it was me.

If the whole point of a game is to provide an interactive experience, then the most frustrating thing that can happen is that a player will feel as though they do not have control. Too many games already take control away from the player for extended cutscenes or quick-time events. Not even giving them control where they are supposed to be in control of the action is slovenly design.

I usually don’t talk about celebrities because I really do have better things to occupy my time. That said, Natasha Richardson has always been one of my favorite actresses despite having been in only a handful of movies that I’ve actually seen. It was The Comfort of Strangers that I first noticed her while she worked with Rupert Everett, my introduction to him as well. Also, this is a movie that cemented Christopher Walken as the king of creepy, even though I eventually saw earlier work of his that showed me he had been at it for awhile. She was always stellar in everything she did, even the unnecessary remake of The Parent Trap.

45 is simply too young to pass and I feel for her husband and children.

GAME OF THE MONTH Midnight Club: Los Angeles
Despite some glaring flaws this is still a good racer that continues following the new direction the series set with Midnight Club 3. I was hoping for more and a lot of my fears about the new game were confirmed, but it’s still a decent racer which is something oddly absent in the current generation. As much as I want to give Buddy’s top pick game of the month I remain sufficiently dubious of the quality of the C&C franchise on the 360 to give it the top spot.
- Jason O

BEST OF THE MONTH (Buddy Pine)
	#1 Command and Conquer 3: Tiberium Wars (X360) Tiberium Wars is the game Red Alert 3 should have taken ques from in terms of balance. It doesn’t feel as innovative but who cares about innovation if it fails. It’s far more playable and you aren’t punished for making small mistakes. A game you can fire up and actually win while burning some time playing with toy robots and crushing infantry with tank treads. Replay value rules this title.
	#2 Command and Conquer: Red Alert 3 (X360) It’s not often I can use the term “love/hate relationship” but here it actually applies. Red Alert 3 is confused and unforgiving. I feel like being rewarded for playing at least with the experience, but RA3 makes you feel like the game actually has something against you. Yes I actually get a vibe of resentment for trying to play against it or for not doing things it’s way. RA3 is a title I still can’t hate but the more I try to play it the more I do. I supposed if I wasn’t so in love with the franchise I might have been more forgiving, as it stands I am considering placing this title in my “worst of 2009 list” already merely out of sheer contempt for EA’s handling of it.

BEST SO FAR - Buddy Pine

1. Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare
2. Quake 4
3. Command and Conquer 3: Tiberium Wars
4. Call of Duty 3
5. Command and Conquer: Red Alert 3

BEST OF THE MONTH (Jason O)
	#1 Midnight Club: Los Angeles (X360) When it comes to Midnight Club I’m fairly gun shy. While Midnight Club 3 was one of the best racers I played from the last generation, it’s predecessor was one of the worst. Midnight Club: Los Angeles is like Midnight Club 3, except less of everything. Only one city, fewer cars, less customization, and less variety. While the game is absolutely gorgeous it is obvious that most of the effort went into making the game look good. Unfortunately, they did add a few new features. Pink slip races without a retry option is one of the most infuriating and is instantly “not fun” simply because a race can be lost by one simple mistake at the end. There is nothing quite as frustrating as skunking the competition the entire race in your car that you’ve lovingly built up to suddenly lose it because of one mistake at the finish line. Overall it’s a good game but a better looking and shallower sequel.
	#2 Speed Racer (Wii) As a movie, Speed Racer was a visual assault but an oddly good time. Would it surprise you to find out the game is the exact same way? A fairly decent racing game that actually does a good job with the Wii controls, this game actually incorproates the ridiculously cheesy but fun “Car-Fu” from the movie into the races. You can jump right in and figure out the basics quickly, but they were kind enough to provide in depth tutorials so that you could maximize the experience. One of those rare games that actually toes the line of easy to learn but difficult to master. An under-appreciated gem that is fun for the whole family. I can’t believe I actually said that!
	#3 Bioshock (X360) Maybe this game is just overhyped, I’m not seeing what is so great about it. I think it’s trying to be scary, but it’s not really. It is creepy, but almost in an annoying way. Creepy like that guy at work who hangs around the receptionist’s desk just a little too much and not creepy like finding out your next door neighbor got arrested as a serial killer. The game is “neat” enough and I appreciate the simple controls that allow you to switch between powers and weapons with no fuss. Unfortunately, the game is just not very compelling and I find myself having a hard time getting into it. Granted, I’m not that far into the game, but I purchased it at the beginning of the month and have spent more time with games purchased well after it. I’m just not having fun, in fact I’m a little bored. I keep plodding along and nothing interesting seems to be happening.

BEST SO FAR - Jason O

1. Burnout Paradise
2. Midnight Club: Los Angeles
3. Puzzle Quest
4. Call of Duty: World at War
5. Speed Racer
6. Bioshock
7. Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grade?
8. Doritos: Dash of Destruction
9. Corvette
10. Super Trucks Racing

WORST SO FAR

1. Drome Racers

REPURCHASES
As usual, post holiday remorse kicked in. Fortunately, just one title this year.

• Soldier of Fortune: Payback (X360 - Jason O)
  This is not a great game, in fact it could easily be classified as bad. I think the reviews have been overly harsh on it but I’m not entirely sure why. I will say that no other game has given me so many options for loadouts before and that is what I missed. There is something grand about choosing which weapon and how it is configured for every mission. Do I want a grenade launcher or would I benefit from the extra stability of a forward grip? Do I need a reflex sight for close combat or a rifle scope for distant targets? Do I want a submachinegun for backup? A shotgun? I’m still mystified why better shooters don’t give players these kinds of options. The top “real world” military shooters should be allowing players to do this!

That is what I care about. Are you getting the job done? As much as businesses obsess over personal phone calls, surfing the web, posting to blogs, and other activities, I can’t help but notice that there are some people who simply don’t accomplish much even though they appear to always be busy. Yes, there are people who goof off on company time as well. As far as I’m concerned, someone’s output and accomplishments are the real measure of their worth to the company. So I have quit worrying about what people are doing.

At the same time, there are some lines that just should not be crossed. I don’t mean fine lines but rather lines that would be analogous to the double yellow line on a highway that clearly marks you should not cross them. In my mind, one of those lines is e-mail. Specifically, using your company e-mail address for personal business.

I keep a Yahoo! account for personal reasons. If I want to send something to my wife, respond to a friend, or attend to an important matter that is not work related, I use it. Even if I need something urgently I don’t use my work e-mail even though the Yahoo! mail is not actively open all the time. Honestly, if I need to know something urgently I’ll probably use a cell phone for that. I get really peeved when I see someone has sent me something from their work e-mail. Why? Why is that necessary? Why are you cluttering up the company mail server with your personal crap? Are you telling me that joke couldn’t wait till you get home? Did you really have to send all those attachments? Is your boss ok with this?

I’ve walked in on employees before and caught them with gmail or Yahoo! mail open on several occasions. I’ve never said a word. Cracking down on that would just encourage them to cross a line I’d rather they not. If you’re going to engage in personal business during company time, make sure you keep it as separate as possible. Do you really want some network weenie possibly reading your personal business? At least if they check server logs all they’ll see is you used webmail. Thankfully, our company doesn’t block that. Even when I worked at places that did I simply waited till I got home and did my personal business then. Now, I do make an exception if this is internal and someone decides to share something with their co-workers. We don’t all know each others personal information, but I have someone outside of work who sends me stuff to my personal e-mail from his work account all the time!

Look, in the white collar world where you typically get paid well above the median salary work and personal does tend to intermingle. At the same time, out of a sense of professionalism it’s a best practice to keep the two as distinct as possible. For one thing, it’s mentally healthier. For another, it just sets a much more professional tone. No, it doesn’t look good on the surface to be caught sending something via Hotmail. On the other hand, it is a more professional tactic to do so. Besides, the technically savvy know you can send e-mail by phone now, it’s not like companies can stop it. Technology makes it too easy. If your boss gets this, there is no reason to be using work e-mail for non-work related business.

My brother-in-law Nathan is an avid player of Tetris Party on the Nintendo Wii, every chance he gets he positions himself on the couch, tosses a pillow under his feet on the ottoman and fires the game up for a bit of online world play. He is a strong player with an average score of between 6000 and 7000 points. I say “average” because this is the realm in which his score fluctuates.

Accusations that Nintendo likes arbitrary equalization of the scoring system and slanted game mechanics is nothing new. Penny Arcade has broached the subject and I have experienced some of the same issues present in Mario Party.

Tetris Party’s online component randomly pits you against players in a head-to-head challenge where clearing blocks or combinations will reward the opponent with a corresponding number of blocks under their workable blocks.

The major issue is the sliding scale by which Nintendo rewards and more importantly, punishes players for a loss.

The scale functions as such: As a new player you receive points for each victory, if you lose then a certain number are subtracted from your overall score. New players (those with lower scores) will receive larger amounts of points for each victory and a small portion subtracted. As you progress up the ladder the scale tips from rewarding victory to punishing failure. The amount of points earned per victory diminishes and the points subtracted increase exponentially.

I watched as my brother-in-law approached the 7000 point mark, a single win granted him 15 points towards his score, but the corresponding loss that followed saw 65 points taken away. If you lose to a player of lower ranking, their victory is given a much higher value than yours while your loss hits your points to a much greater extent. The scales problem is the tipping point, if you are a few hundred points higher than the shift point, your punishment becomes exponentially greater automatically.

Nathan waged a series of battles with the same player. They were pretty much on an equal footing, both winning and loosing an equal number of matches. By the end of their run they both had lost nearly 1000 points. They were essentially, BOTH loosing even though they were engaging in an equal exchange of blows. Eventually they both quit out of the matches because neither wanted to be punished.

What game translates four losses as twenty-fourth place?

The games does not provide players with the same pieces but generates random shapes, it is entirely possible to lose by a string of pieces that leave you with limited options. This “random” element throws a wrench in to the game’s overall mechanics. I’ve seen players lose simple because they were given pieces with no good corresponding place to drop them while your opponent blitzes you with combos.

One might say” thats up the skill of the player to determine, its a puzzle”, if this is your view then I’m sorry to say you either aren’t a player or you haven’t examined the dynamic well enough.

A simple crunch of the numbers outlines the flaw. A single loss must be countermanded by four or even five victories as you reach a higher level. That single loss punishes the player while those below your level are given more points and less punishment to bring them up to a higher level faster. While it is true that you need to win a proportionally larger number of games to attain a score, the balance favors lesser players and assaults ranking ones. The ratios are be designed to keep everyone within a specific score range.

In later stages, four losses need to be offset with as many as twenty-six victories, and this will only bring you back to your previous score. Whats worse, how you attain victory does not seem to be a factor, are you given extra points for beating players in a shorter period of time? Perhaps for stringing combinations or performing certain moves in succession? Not at all.

Good players need to be proportionally rewarded, not exponentially punished for their success. Being forced to win constantly to maintain your basic standing is not amusing or frankly, fair. This is little better than some strange form of socialism where you are unable to adequately gauge the rank and quality of a player unless they ace the game and maintain a near perfect record of victories. how is this different than games like Gran Turismo where you need to hit the perfect button combination every time within a fraction of a second to achieve a basic goal? Here the dynamic is skewed further because of the introduction of the random elements.

There are always players who can do this, but the disparity means that equal rank players will not be readily apparent because one has to ask, how many victories does this player have? The system dictates those with more victories are equalized and totaled in with players that have more losses than they do.

This reduces the overall quality of the title experience. If you don’t care about anything but dropping blocks, thats fine, go play Bejewled or Bubble Breaker. Once you introduce a scoring system your game mechanic has to function within that set of parameters in order to make sense of it all. If you don’t then frankly you are proving to me that you don’t really care all that much about your product or engaging the minds of people who play with some form of strategy and goals. This can be the difference between a great game and one that feels mediocre and sloppy.

Japanese games are notorious for punishing players instead of rewarding them, but Nintendo seems to have more than a few games designed where everyone is intentionally kept equal and unless they overcome the game itself, are not allowed to shine or stand-out. This is the worst kind of “everyone is special” crap that ruins games for those with anything more than a casual interest in them. Nobody likes to be kicked in the beanbag, but Nintendo’s only justification for this seems to be that you deserve it because you dared to display you are more talented than the other players.

Good game design does not force artificial punishment on players by exerting a “fairness doctrine”. Games are meant to be unfair but it has to prove this inequality by allowing people to succeed by allowing their talents to challenge each other without standing in their way.