Unfettered Blather

Take it with a grain of salt. I know Jason is a Guitar Hero fan but my ire is focused at the rest of the world and darn it, I just can’t help but mock trends for my own amusement.

There is a lot of misconceptions about the creativity and unique attributes of Guitar Hero. Allow me to chart the Guitar Hero family tree for your reading pleasure:

The roots of Guitar Hero can be traced to a more or less linear progression. The history begins much like the current Guitar Hero, with a cultural fad:

Simon (1978)

Guitar Hero’s “father” as it were, Simon shares a great deal in common with it’s offspring. The original technology memory game, Simon was the cultural fad of the 80s, Guitar Hero shares this future camp status weather it acknowledges it or not. Simon used flashing buttons and memorization speed to keep the user entertained. There was a similar evolution to a hand held version strikingly similar to the guitar shape called “Bop It”

Guitar Hero’s primary difference is that it has dropped the actual memorization aspect in large part for a data stream approach that it’s primary progenitor pioneered:

Dance Dance Revolution (1998)

Probably best described as the original Guitar Hero (although many fans would scoff at the truth), DDR became popular by prompting users to “dance” on a giant d-pad while keeping track with the visual ques given on the screen. DDR is more than similar to Guitar Hero, only the method of interaction has changed in a tangible sense to something less physically demanding. The formula is essentially the same.

DDR was not without it’s flaws. The original concept was very much designed as an arcade only draw that suffered heavily in flavor as a home version (also refered to as the “Time Crisis Effect”). After the mass hysteria subsided and the cultural embrace mellowed out, the simple fact was you looked like a complete tool dancing on a DDR arcade machine. While there is still a debate on how much of a tool you look like while playing Guitar Hero or it’s competitor “Rock Band, there are certain pros and cons in it’s favor.

Please note, tool ratings are subject to change at any time.

The first is lack of public exposure. DDR as a home port stunk like a diaper bin, this meant in order to play it in proper fashion you needed to actually go in to public and jump around like a chimpanzee. Guitar Hero allows a quality home experience while avoiding public exposure. It’s popularity is possibly also tied to the lack of physical exercise required from the average gamer and from leaving the “game cave”.

Guitar Hero’s primary problem is that it is essentially“Air Guitar”. Outside of frat boys and possibly socially ostracized office coworkers, this is a dangerous activity to engage in because it surpasses even DDR in terms of sheer “tool-like” displays. Again, if done in your own home your tool rating is much lower. The upcoming Metallica edition will no doubt push Guitar Hero’s tool status beyond the level where private play can no longer be counted on to keep your tool level within accepted norms. Buyer beware.

Guitar Hero wisely profited from using licensing agreements to entertain users with current and well loved music themes, first put to good effect in “Grand Theft Auto: Vice City” radio feature.

It could be worse I suppose, they could release some completely silly looking peripheral for a handheld system to allow people to play Guitar Hero in public….Oh, wait… Like these people don’t already look like complete toads constantly molesting their iPods.

Personally I’m waiting for the day when most of these players will refuse to admit they actually played the game like they did with DDR. Its coming, and I’m getting ready to savor the moment.

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